It's all about drama

I was going to write about something else today, but I saw an item on Yahoo that I just had to comment about.  In keeping with the spirit of this blog, I will work hard to keep my comments positive, in fact it's a good test for me since I'm pretty incensed about this news article.

So, here's the story:  http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/index.php?cl=13678779

The headline reads: "Man pushes suicide jumper" with the sideline adding "Angry commuter, stuck in traffic, shoves jumper off bridge".  First reaction: "that's awful!".  But then I listened to the story.  Yes, the angry commuter did push the jumper off the bridge, but he landed on a partially inflated rescue mat.  Certainly doesn't excuse the commuter's behaviour.  Perhaps he should have been more sympathetic to the man's cause -- obviously the jumper was terribly troubled by his financial problems.

But, again, that's not my point.  My point is that we let ourselves be manipulated by our news media.  The headline could have said "Man pushes would-be suicide jumper to safety".  But that doesn't grab as many headlines, does it?  This is a good lesson in being very aware of the information we receive and how we react to it.  We are in control of what we think, how we react, what we accept as truth.  Especially today as we are bombarded with information, we need to be extra vigilant.  So, next time you see a headline screaming drama, take a minute to find out the reality before reacting...it might save a few blood pressure points!

Have a great, non-drama-filled day!

Monique

Expect the Best

I'm re-reading Sarah Ban Breathnach's "Simple Abundance".  I read it first in 1999 and so many of the things she wrote resonated for me.  It's been a while since I've re-read it, so I figured now would be a good time.

One idea seemed particularly interesting to me last night.  It's an exercise where you "Expect the Best".  Here's the way I did it: I wrote down 5 or 6 things that were going to be happening to me in the next few days.  Then I wrote down the best way they could turn out, the best outcome I could imagine.  Most of us have a hard time actually writing down that something great is going to happen to us; for example, I started writing about the response to an offer I was providing to some colleagues, saying 3 or 4 of them would respond positively, but actually the BEST thing that could happen is that they all respond and tell other people who want to get in on the offer too!  Then I let myself daydream about these best outcomes...what it would feel like, how I would respond, what actions I would be taking, etc.

It's quite scary, but if you believe even just some of the things "they" say about the Law of Attraction, great things can happen.  For example, I just got off the phone with a supplier who offered to renew my service subscription for free because I was unable to take advantage of the service for the last 2 years -- imagine that!  (actually I did last night!).

So, today, expect the best.  We spend a lot of mental energy expecting the worst (bad traffic, boss is in a bad mood, customer won't answer the phone, kids will be difficult, etc); why not redirect that energy towards best possible outcomes...after all, it's all in our head anyways, right?

Have a happy hump day! 

Middle of the night musings

I haven't really slept well for about 10 years.  Some nights I sleep right through to 5:30am, but mostly I spend about an hour between 3:30 and 4:30am staring at the clock, wondering when I'm going to fall asleep again.  Not too sure why I don't sleep, it's probably a combination of things.

But that's not what this blog is about...this blog is about the USEFUL part of not sleeping in the middle of the night.  For those of you who have insomnia, you'll be saying to yourselves "right, as if there is a useful part!".  But actually, I figured it out last night (ok actually this morning at 4:36): when you finally start falling asleep again, your brain flits between consciousness and unconsciousness.  And that's when powerful thoughts, a-ha moments as some people call them, occur.  It's as if the spirit world is trying to reach out to the real world and get a message across. 

So what was this morning's message?  Michealangelo.  Yup, Michealangelo.  Sculptor of the famous David in Florence, painter of the Sistine Chapel ceiling, lover of marble.  If you read The Agony and the Ecstacy, you'll find out that he believed that a slab of marble already had a scupture in it...it was just up to the artist to chip away the unnecessary pieces to discover the art inside.  Michealangelo struggled his entire life to make ends meet.  Typical artist story: can't make money doing what he really wants, doesn't really want to do what will pay the bills.  So he compromised most of his life but still managed to create some of the world's most beautiful art.

How is this an a-ha moment?  Perhaps it is a message to keep on going, do what we love to do and maybe in a few hundred years, our creations will be seen for the art that they are.  Maybe it is telling us that no matter what form our creation takes on, it is still beautiful and worth doing.  Maybe it is linked to a message I read yesterday: "God never said that life would be easy.  He just promised that it would be worth it."  (translated from the original message -- thanks, Chantal!)   

So, in honour of Michealangelo, today I keep moving forward, knowing that what I am doing is worth it, no matter how hard the struggle, knowing that the art is already there, I just have to chip away at the unimportant stuff to reach it.

Have a great week!

Monique

Zen et l'art de nettoyer une piscine

Je suis extrêmement chanceuse d'avoir acheter une maison l'année passée qui a une piscine extérieure.  Même si nous sommes encore en train d'apprendre à l'entretenir, j'ai découvert un avantage tout à fait inattendu...comment c'est paisible de passer le filet pour nettoyer la surface de l'eau!  Puisque notre piscine est entourée de cèdres, nous devons la nettoyer chaque soir.  C'est tellement agréable que c'est une compétition pour voir qui va passer le filet!

Des activités tranquilles, paisibles, faciles mais demandant un peu d'attention sont rares dans nos vies.  Nous roulons toujours à 100 Km à l'heure (120 pour mes amis en Alberta!).  Mais nous pourrons s'arrêter de temps en temps pour s'offrir une activité "zen", que ce soit nettoyer la piscine, brosser les chats, ramasser les branches qui sont tombées durant la dernière journée de vent, contempler la flamme d'un feu ou d'une chandelle, écouter de la musique...on pourrait se rédiger une liste et choisir au hasard quand l'envie nous prend d'arrêter pour un moment.

Tout ça fait partie du soin que nous devons porter à notre corps et notre esprit.  Cette fin-de-semaine, trouvez-vous du temps pour rédiger votre liste d'activités zen et choisissez-en une...après tout, vous avez passer à travers la semaine, c'est une bonne raison pour vous donner une récompense!

Bonne fin-de-semaine!

Monique  

The medium is the message

In 1964 (the year I was born!), Marshall McLuhan coined this phrase.  I never quite understood what he meant; whenever anyone spoke of this, they assumed you knew what it meant.  But I think I figured it out and how it is even more relevant today.

Back in the 60s and 70s, the medium was television.  Everyone seeing the same images, access for all, truth through divulging what was previously hidden.  Historians claim that this was why the Vietnam War ended, why Nixon was forced to resign because of Watergate, why Pierre Trudeau won election after election.  The message was: "see for yourself and make a difference".

Today, things are dramatically different.  TV viewship is shrinking, Internet usage has taken over as western society's medium of choice.  People no longer want to see what everyone else is seeing, they want to select, to participate.  Of particular interest is the need for people to communicate their message.  This is so obvious in social networking sites.  When I heard that Twitter was designed so that you could tell people exactly what you were doing at any moment during the day, I figured it out...the message is "listen to me, hear what I am saying, notice me!".  We have created a society that allows people to use technology to communicate their story...

Or is it that society forces us to use this technology?  Perhaps we have become so individualized, so insulated from real contact that we must create and use technology to tell people what we are doing.  Probably the most important gift my Mother gave me as a teenager was the 30 minutes at the end of each school day where she just listened...to all the "stuff" I needed to say, to hear of my successes and challenges, to tell me without words that I was important.  Perhaps we need to think about the opportunities we have to do the same for each other; be there and listen, in real life, to let them know that they are important.  Perhaps it is too easy to ignore people when they are 2-dimensional images on our computer screens.  

L'importance de jouer

Je me suis réveillée ce matin et un de mes chats a sauté sur le lit pour jouer son jeu préféré: "les souris en dessous des couvertures" (c'est quand tu bouges tes pieds comme s'il y avait des souris et le chat bondit pour les attraper).  Je lui ai indulgé pour quelques moments et ça m'a fait penser à l'importance de jouer dans la vie.

Nos vies sont compliquées, nous sommes stressés, nous avons beaucoup de responsabilités et nous les prenons sur nos épaules.  Mais nous sommes encore les mêmes êtres qui étaient, il y a longtemps, des enfants.  Nous avons besoin de sortir du sérieux de temps en temps pour se divertir, pour donner à l'esprit un peu de souffle, pour rire.  Plusieurs études scientifiques nous ont démontré comment ceci est bon pour notre santé.  Je vous suggère de consulter le site Web de Loretta Laroche, une conférencière qui a fait beaucoup de recherches sur le sujet (voir http://lorettalaroche.com/).  

Ce qu'on oublie, parfois, c'est que jouer n'a pas besoin d'être compliqué ou cher, ni de prendre beaucoup de temps.  Si vous avez un chien ou un chat, prenez un vieux lacet de soulier, attachez quelque noeuds dans le lacet et lancez un bout vers votre animal.  Sinon, lisez un vieux livre de BD que vous aimiez quand vous étiez jeune ou bien allez au parc voir les enfants jouer.  Et l'Internet est parfait pour trouver quelque chose pour nous faire rire -- juste YouTube saura vous plaire pour plusieurs heures.

N'importe comment, trouvez-vous une manière de jouer aujourd'hui... vous verrez comment vous pourrez mieux gérer les stress de la vie quotidienne.

Gardening

I'm taking the day off from my ÉnergieNow! work to do some gardening.  Sounds strange in the middle of the week, but it reminds me of a topic of particular importance that I wanted to talk about in this blog.

I recently read a book by Dr. Kelly Lambert called "Lifting Depression".  Dr. Lambert presents research suggesting that you can help lift depressive feelings by triggering certain parts of the brain -- this is called the "effort-driven rewards circuit".  Without going into too much detail, the concept is to find an activity that requires physical movement, especially using your hands, something that requires the problem-solving part of your brain, and that has a particularly meaningful purpose for you.  

While it has managed to be sunny this week, Montreal has had its share of clouds lately, and I'm left with a lower than average disposition.  To pull me out of this rut, I figured gardening would be perfect.  Doesn't hurt that there are millions of dandelions in my flower beds and some serious work is required to pull my yard together for the summer.

So, here I go!  I'm sure I'll be pretty sore by the end of the day, but I will have beautiful flower beds to show for my hard work.  Sounds perfect for a Wednesday!

Have a great day!

Monique 

Interprétation positive

(oh, oui, je vais écrire ce blog alternant entre l'anglais et le français -- alors les deux langues officielles y seront présentes!)

En parlant d'idées positives, j'ai eu la chance d'écouter une colloque présentée par John Ralston Saul il y a deux semaines, lors d'un festival littéraire.  Il parlait de son nouveau livre, "Mon pays métis: Quelques vérités sur le Canada" ("A Fair Country" en anglais).  Sa thèse est que la civilisation canadienne a trois piliers: l'anglophone, le francophone et l'autochtone.  Il dit que le pilier anglophone est fort depuis longtemps, le pilier francophone prenait sa force depuis quelques décénies (après tout, il faut l'admettre si Stephen Harper peut se prononcer en français dans la chambre des communes!), mais que le pilier autochtone était encore faible.

Ensuite il a expliqué comment notre civilisation a été fortement influencée par la société autochtone; par exemple, notre système d'aide juridique vient d'expériences avec les Inuits dans le nord; la considération de nos eaux comme unificateurs (système de transport et de communication) au lieu d'un sépérateur (idée européenne qu'une rivière séparait les ennemis); l'acceptation de la diversité comme force; même la protection de l'individu et du groupe qui sont présents dans notre charte de droits et libertés.

Tout ça pour dire que des choses intéressantes arrivent quand on considère les autochtones du sens positif et non du sens négatif.  Souvent on les présente comme les faibles de notre société, ceux qui ont besoin de notre aide, de notre contrôle...mais si on arrêtait un moment, on verrait que c'est peut-être eux qui devraient nous protéger, comme ils l'ont fait quand les européens sont venus il y a quelques centaines d'années.

Finalement, je suis fière d'être le résultat de ces trois piliers: mes ancêtres autochtones (si tu viens du Manitoba, c'est pas mal certain que tu as du sang autochtone), ma culture canadienne française et mes habitudes anglophones.  Je prends ce qui a de meilleur des trois.

I'm blogging!

Ok, maybe this is in response to the fact that I realized on Friday that I will be turning 45 this year! (OMG, is it possible that I'm getting old?). But actually, it's more likely that everything is telling me that I need to communicate in new ways to influence...and influence is what I'm all about.

For those of you who don't know me all that well, I created a Purpose statement 8 years ago. Without going into too many details, my purpose is all about "bettering the human experience". This is why I am in the coaching and consulting business. So this blog will be about bettering the human experience...through sharing ideas, stories, tools, experiences...anything that can help make this a better planet to live on.

There are only a two rules:

1) what is posted here will be positive; not necessarily life through rose-coloured glasses, but realistic positive messages;
2) no ranting, no complaining, no drama, no adrenaline-raising crises.

Ok, so now I've started. Oh yeah, that's today's message: start...follow the Nike advice and just do it! Once you've put it out there, you have to keep going -- I think that's often what success is all about.

Have a great day -- it's finally sunny in Montréal -- yay!

Monique