Maintain that vacation feeling!

You’ve just arrived home from your annual vacation. You’re relaxed, happy, rested and full of energy. And then...reality hits! You’re bombarded by all the demands of home, work and relationships. You feel as if you’re being punished for having felt so good. Here are a few tips to help you maintain that vacation feeling in the midst of the chaos that greets you:

• Follow your body’s rhythm and its need for natural sources of energy: eat fresh fruit and vegetables, and maximize the time you spend in the sunlight.
• Vacations replace responsibility with choice. Look at your daily decisions as choices rather than burdens and focus on the positive elements of each choice.
• Ever notice that you rarely meet unhappy people on vacation? Think about whom you work and play with, and make a conscious choice to surround yourself with people that are good for you.
• Rediscover the wonder of your vacation by experiencing beauty in your normal surroundings. Buy a flowering plant, visit a local art gallery, find a cafe with a view, or keep your favourite vacation photo near you.
• Often we behave differently while on vacation. Take the hint and continue behaving in this more authentic way.

Maintaining that vacation feeling will allow you to resist against the stresses of daily life in a meaningful and sustainable way. You might just find that you don’t need that expensive vacation next year!

Vacation Report

Vacations are generally viewed as reasons to "get away": either from our daily work, our regular surroundings, our routines. But vacations are also valuable opportunities to "get to" places we've never seen, have experiences we don't often have time to enjoy during the rest of the year, talk to people we wouldn't normally even notice.

On my recent week off, my boyfriend and I set off to spend a few days in Atlantic City -- not too far a drive from Montreal and you never know what we might find along the way. In fact, my best "get to" experiences happened on the way there and on the way back. Not to say that AC wasn't a great place, but I think the surprises we discovered along the way created more charming memories.

It wasn't exactly on a direct route between Montreal and Atlantic City, but we ended up the first night in New Haven, Connecticut (home of Yale University). Turns out there is a ferry near New Haven that crosses over to Long Island. Although I've travelled quite a bit of the U.S. East Coast, I had never been to there, so we decided it was a great way to spend a Sunday afternoon. Destination: Port Jefferson, NY (see the picture above). What a great town! I highly recommend it to those of you who love spending a day wanding into quaint shops, talking to interesting people and discovering great finds (I bought these fabulous old-fashioned Christmas cards!). I especially recommend The Scented Cottage Garden, that advertises itself as a place to find "Decorative Accessories for Home and Garden". We spoke to Marge McCuen, the owner, who is a great promoter of the town and will help you enjoy your visit. She reminded us to return at the beginning of December for their Charles Dickens Festival -- now that is something that's worth putting on the calendar!

On our way back to Montreal after a few days in Atlantic City, we stopped for lunch at another great NY town: Saratoga Springs. Some of you may know that it is a thriving horse racing community, but in fact it is so much more! Fabulous old B&Bs, tons of restaurants and a huge bookstore to waste away an afternoon or two. Oh and a perfect candy shop for that last U.S. purchase before the border crossing!

So, if you are ever in the area, I recommend you check out these two towns -- definitely worth the stop, or even as a weekend destination! Remember, the "get to" is just as important as the "get away"!

The FABULOUS List

It occured to me the other day that, by habit, we live in a world of "ok". We have become so blasé by all the great people, situations, environments and things that surround us that everything seems "well, ok, but...".

I'm a great believer in the gratitude exercise that is suggested by most personal growth writers. There are a few ways of doing this, but basically you write down things you are grateful for, even on days when you feel lousy. If you have nothing to write about, you're supposed to list things like "I have two legs" (if you do) or "I woke up this morning". This is all good. But if you've ever practiced this exercise, have you ever written an entry and said to yourself "ok, yeah, I'm grateful for that, but it could be so much better" and then felt that you were trying to convince yourself that you were satisfied that this element of your life was the way it was -- that "just ok" was good enough?

One of the downsides of gratitude exercises is that they encourage us to look at the ordinary in our lives. But what about the extraordinary? We have the habit of lumping the two groups of elements into one pile, and the extraordinary, the fabulous, get totally lost in the ordinary. So I'm going to suggest a new exercise. It won't give us as long a list as the gratitude exercise. It won't necessarily make us feel good about the "ok" things in our lives. But it will help us notice the absolutely fantastic, fabulous, extraordinary things that we are all so fortunate to have. And it will help us realize that these things are truly fabulous and not simply "ok". I call this the FABULOUS LIST exercise.

My list has personal things on it that I won't necessarily share with everyone. But right near the top of my list are the three FABULOUS bookcases in my library. They are from Indonesia, I paid a sinful amount of money for them (when I had quite a bit more disposable income than I have today), they have survived a move across the country and one of my cats loves to sit on the top of the tallest one. They often go unnoticed as I walk by them from my office to the kitchen, but today, I will stop and pay attention to the dark wood grain, the intricate workmanship and remember the hard work I had completed to receive the bonus I used to pay for them.

So, there is an example of how to complete your FABULOUS LIST. I could tell you to write down one thing every day for the next 21 days ("they" say that this is the best way to create a habit). But I know that I don't have to, because once you start thinking about the fabulous things in your life, you will want to continue writing until your hand hurts. It may also inspire you to go get new FABULOUS things that you have been wanting for a long time.

Just remember: FABULOUS IS GOOD!

Zen et l'art de déchiqueter

L'été est toujours un bon temps pour faire le ménage dans toute la paperasse que nous accumulons durant l'année (et plusieurs années, si vous êtes comme moi et gardez trop de papiers trop longtemps!).

Juste avant mes vacances, j'ai fait le ménage dans mes dossiers personnels courants : les factures, les papiers d'assurance, les états de comptes de banques, etc. J'ai retrouvé un cartable qui rassemblait tous les papiers associés avec la vente de ma vieille maison et l'achat de la nouvelle en 2007. Les papiers importants (hypothèque, contrat d'achat, mis à jour de mon testament) étaient tous mêlés avec les notes de discussion, les petits bouts de papier avec une adresse de maison particulièrement intéressante, les cartes d'affaires de plusieurs agents immobiliers et les responsables de banques, etc. Après le trie, je serrai les papiers importants, jetai les papiers inutiles, mais puisque plusieurs des informations dans les documents que j'avais à jeter étaient confidentielles, j'avais une immense pile de papiers à déchiqueter.

Quelle expérience à déchiqueter tous ces souvenirs d'un temps de transition pour moi! Avec chaque papier qui disparaissait dans la machine, je sentais un fardeau se soulever de mes épaules, comme si finalement je lâchais cette ancienne vie et j'assumais complètement la nouvelle. C'était vraiment la fin de la transition pour moi, même si ça faisait 18 mois que nous avions déménagés.

Nous sommes souvent tellement pris dans les évènements de transition dans nos vies, et nous passons tellement vite aux exigences du nouveau quotidien, que nous oublions de compléter les activités de transition, de fermer la porte sur cette aventure pour passer à autre chose. C'est surtout important de compléter la transition psychologique, pour pouvoir mettre tout son énergie dans sa nouvelle vie.

L'action de déchiqueter (ou tout acte tangible qui nous démontre la fin d'une transition) nous permet de fermer cette porte. En plus, nous profitons d'un environnement plus propre, moins encombré et prêt à nous servir dans nos prochains projets. La prochaine fois que vous complétez un projet de transition, faîtes le ménage dans vos papiers et prenez le temps de déchiqueter les informations confidentielles; vous verez comment ça fait du bien!

Inspiring Books

Summertime often ends up being a time of reading for many people. Out of our routines, we take time to sit for a few hours and lose ourselves in a trashy novel, an educational piece that we've been interested in for a while, or something that inspires us to continue along our life path.

Reading is a critical element in my life. It wasn't always that way. When I was young, my sister Denise read constantly (ok, maybe that's an exageration, but it seemed like it). I wasn't all that interested in books and my reading skills at school were considered below average. Then during my university studies, reading was something you HAD to do to pass exams -- ugh! But then something happened in my thirties that I hope happens to all of you that say you don't really like reading: I found books that I was actually interested in! It's amazing how much easier it is to read when you are inspired by and enthralled with the topic!

This week, the book that has me captivated is "The Compassionate Samurai" by Brian Klemmer. What I especially like about this book is that it talks about being passionate and achieving a lot, but without having to follow the traditional behaviour of being an a**hole. You don't have to be aggressive to achieve. You can actually decide to be considerate, compassionate. You can keep your word, consider other people's feelings, take personal responsibility for the choices you have make in life.

For those of you who think this sounds interested, I highly recommend the book. For those of you who say "yeah, right, not for me", I suggest that you get out off your chair and head to your nearest bookstore or library. Look around, turn your brain off a bit and just let your eyes guide you. Trust that you will notice a book cover or a title that intrigues you. Listen to that intuition and pick up the book. Often I find that the books that have picked me are much more interesting than the ones I pick.

And for those of you far too modern to actually read a book and prefer electronic viewing, there is an extensive library of e-books available. Google "ebooks" and you will find many websites that offer several choices in whatever topic interests you.

Happy reading!