Live and in person!

I was flipping through my older posts trying to figure out if I've already written on this topic. Well, if I have, just skip today's blog and come back next time you have a few minutes. But wait, maybe I have something new to say about this...

About what, you say? Live, human, in-person interactions. Ok, get it over with, call me old-fashioned (actually I'm quite proud of being old-fashioned, I assume it is associated with wisdom and getting away with things people would normally say you aren't allowed to do!). But I am actually quite serious. In this fabulous technology-driven society that we have created, we have abandoned the concept of meeting people face-to-face. I actually read a discussion stream from a LinkedIn group that talked about how workplace meetings were dead and people didn't need to get all together in a room anymore.

On the other hand, another LinkedIn group (Linked Quebec) has decided that live get-togethers actually enhance the online networking experience. So they have set up a series of informal meetings and the reviews from the first one rave about how great it was!

Human beings are social animals. The theory of evolution tells us that we are descendants from the same line as monkeys, orangutans, gorillas, etc. Check out their behaviour next time you are at the zoo. They play together, they eat together, they even pick bugs out of each other's fur. Why would we be any different? Throughout history, mankind has excelled when we have worked as teams to create: the great artists of the Renaissance worked with large teams of assistants, putting a man on the moon required a huge contingent of scientists, engineers and others, even Mozart needed an audience to test his latest opera.

So next time you text your Mother to wish her a happy birthday, or you update your Facebook to tell everyone about some good news, or you exchange emails with a prospective client, think about setting up a live, in-person meeting...and consider all the added benefits: you get to see the smile in the person's eyes instead of :-), you can maybe give them a hug if they are down in the dumps, you could notice that they turn into themselves when an uncomfortable topic comes up allowing you to be more careful in your comments, and you can SHOW them that you care.

By the way, when was the last time I met with you? Maybe we should set up some time over coffee???

See you soon!

Start with Why

No, I'm not plagiarizing, I'm borrowing the title of the next book I need to read (well, actually, there are probably at least a dozen in line, but this one might be important enough to cut through to the front!). Start with Why is a book written by Simon Sinek.

My friend Errol sent me a link to Simon's TED presentation from last fall. (thank you Errol!). If you are not familiar with TED, it is an organization dedicated to spreading good ideas. They have conferences, post all their talks on their website, www.ted.com, and have become known as the place to hear the latest, especially when it comes to technology.

Simon's talk can be found at

http://www.ted.com/talks/simon_sinek_how_great_leaders_inspire_action.html.

What I found so interesting about this talk is that it presents a way of thinking that lines up very closely to how I think. Cool, I figure I can't be thinking too badly if someone that speaks at a TED conference thinks like me! Essentially Simon's thinking can be summarized like this: instead of starting with What or How, we need to start and especially communicate the Why. In business, this means we need to think about why we are in business, what purpose does our business serve, and then communicate this to the world; people who respond to this "why" will be inspired to become our customers. In life, it means that we need to communicate our "why" to the people around us, and those that respond to this why will help us achieve it.

I have worked long and hard to figure out my "why". It's easy to come up with a few general ideas; in fact I think if you asked, most people would say they want to help people (actually I was at a networking event where we had to present ourselves this way and that is what almost everyone said). It has been much harder to become specific and truly communicate my why. Best as I know it right now, I think it goes something like this:

My "why" is to better the human experience by helping people abandon the negative elements in their lives that cause pain and suffering, identify their positive dreams and achieve these dreams. I will do this by teaching them, through my writing and speaking, how to identify their purpose, how to establish a plan to accomplish this purpose, and how to live this plan on a daily basis. I will help them transform their "adequate" lives into "extraordinary" lives.

I encourage you to view Simon's presentation and to consider what your "why" is, in life and in your work. Think about how you can communicate your why and to whom.

Have a great weekend, and don't think too hard!

Being Ready

Have you ever noticed that something can seem like a really good idea sometimes, but at other times it makes you nervous and you have this feeling like it's just not right?

Quite a few years ago, I was listening to a friend talk about her personal relationship. She was struggling with the decision to either stay with her boyfriend and get married, or else just walk away. She knew that the status quo wasn't working for her, but she simply didn't know which answer was right for her. I reminded her that I had been in a similar position a few years earlier and then some powerful words came out of my mouth: "don't worry about the decision, when you are ready you will be able to make it, but for now you are just not ready yet". (Don't you find it amazing how we are able to say wise things and often don't even know where they come from? hmm, topic for another blog...)

This "being ready" concept is a complex one. You can't create readiness inside of you. You can't make yourself ready for important decisions or critical actions. You can prepare, of course. You can plan and set up timetables. But you can't force yourself. Sometimes we simply need to sit back after all the preparation and wait. Wait for the right time, the right feeling, the oh-so-critical inspiration, the pieces to fall into place, but mostly wait for ourselves to WANT to make that decision or take that action.

Waiting takes patience, something I am not known for. I feel like waiting to be ready seems like wasting precious time. What if this great opportunity passes me by? What if the decision gets made for me while I am waiting to be ready to make it? How can I waste valuable time waiting when I could be using it to all the things I need to do once my decision is made? Why can't I just decide that I am ready now?

But waiting takes something more than patience. It takes (oh, yes, here it comes again!) believing. Believing that things will turn out right once we become ready and make that decision or take that action. That the right opportunities will not have passed us by. That the time spent becoming ready wasn't wasted. It allowed us to build valuable energy and gain useful knowledge and experience. It gave others a chance to learn about our decision or action and prepare to help us.

So next time you feel like you are trying to force yourself to make a decision or take action, ask yourself: am I truly ready for this? What does my gut say? Am I ready but just nervous, scared or lazy? Or am I really just not ready? Trust your intuition, and if you decide that you are not ready, put your decision or action aside. Then, rather than wasting your time worrying that you are not moving forward, ask yourself what might help you become ready. For example, maybe you need to talk about your decision or action with someone that might clarify what is bugging you about it. Or maybe you need to learn more about something related to the decision or action. Or maybe you need to be in a less stressful state. Be patient with yourself and one day you will wake up and say "ok, now I'm ready, let's get on with this!".

Thinking a different way

Ok, now that I've survived a 2-day computer changeover, I can write again! In fact, this is even more fun since I now have a 21-inch monitor (thank you, Guillaum!).

I've been reading Scott Adams' "Stick to Drawing Comics, Monkey Brain". Scott is the Dilbert cartoonist and he has a VERY different way of thinking. This comes across, of course, in his comics, but even more so in his other books. This one is like a daily diary of weird things he's thinking about...worrying whether the airline passenger beside him will bring the plane down because he hasn't turned off his Blackberry, trying to decide if intelligence is linked to happiness (compares dentists to dogs), wondering if clones take part of your soul, etc.

It got me thinking about the power of exposing ourselves to different ways of thinking. I'm a lot more creative after having read a few pages of Adams' book. I look at things a bit more openly and consider different options. I wonder what he would think of some of the things I write, what my contacts post on their social media pages, and some of the events that occur during my day.

I highly recommend trying this every once in a while. Besides this book, I recommend you check out a series of books on famous people's thoughts (Mark Twain, Winston Churchill), some other books in the humour section of your favourite bookstore, various postings on YouTube, and cartoons on the kid-friendly TV stations (you know, Wile E. Coyote had some good ideas!).

Have fun, and enjoy thinking differently; if nothing else, it'll put a smile on your face!