Admitting life is tough

Yes, it has been forever since I've written.  I've had a tough spring.  Yes, I admit it!  Things have been difficult on a few fronts...financial, health, energy.  I guess I shouldn't complain, my house isn't flooded, I haven't had to live through a tsunami, no forest fire has destroyed my home, I have the love of a few very special people and business is looking up.  In fact, I am very lucky.  And yet, I still feel like I've been through my own special storm.

I was talking to a business colleague this morning and realized that we all do the same thing.  We go through tough times, and because we don't want to look like we're not successful, or because we feel guilty because there is always someone in a tougher spot than we are, we keep quiet about our challenges.  We live in quiet desperation, trying on our own to find ways to turn things around.  And we hide in our bubble, thinking we are the only ones living in this state.

The truth?  Many other people, just like us, are living through tough times.  Never mind all the ones we hear about on the news, it's obvious that those folks are in big trouble.  But there are also the ones that no-one talks about.  The small business owner who is struggling through this recession that everyone would like to believe is over (but those of us at the end of the economic ladder know that consumers are not spending and businesses are holding back on investing in their future).  The single parent whose child doesn't understand that there is just not enough money to live like they used to.  The employee who is being squeezed by their customer, their boss and their own perfectionism to work 80 hours a week and still respond to their Blackberry at 7:30pm on a Saturday evening.  So many more that I haven't mentioned...

So what?  Do we simply listen to the loud voice around us and within us and "suck it up"?  Figure it out, put a good face on, consider ourselves lucky?  Or do we listen to the quieter voice deep inside us that says "hey, maybe I could use a hand?".  Maybe it might be a relief to admit that I'm in trouble and seek the advice of someone who might have been through this before, or the comfort of someone going through something similar?

Certainly, we have to pick our audience -- no good telling all of your prospective customers that business has been awful.  But maybe we can find one or two good people, people who are trustworthy, who have a heart, who might just appreciate the fact that we are sharing (and who might be just as happy to share their challenges).  Maybe for once, we could drop the bravado, take off the mask and trust someone with our truth.  Or if you truly cannot trust anyone, it can be as simple as writing it in your journal or on a napkin at lunch and burning it afterwards.

Today, I recommend that you give yourself a chance to express the challenges that you are living with, give yourself a pat on the back for surviving up until now, and look for someone who can ease some of the tension.  Who knows, you just might find that creative answer you didn't even realize you were looking for!